


Of fathers, cats and childish demands

by SeiG



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: I love Hux, I made an account for this, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm trying, If they talk long enough that is, M/M, Pre-Canon, the Force may be too strong with Kylo, they argue a lot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-18
Updated: 2016-01-22
Packaged: 2018-05-14 18:35:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,889
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5753884
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SeiG/pseuds/SeiG
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kylo Ren may not be as childish as he seems.<br/>Hux may not hate him as much as he thinks.<br/>And "it" is certainly not a cat.</p><p>In between trowing tantrums and arguing with the general, Kylo brings something on the board of finalizer and Hux wants to know what it is. Until he does not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This was meant to be just a short and angsty fic only for me and my friend, mostly to make me realize what I think of Kylo Ren... It went terribly wrong and I still have no idea.  
> It's already finished, but I divided it to four chapters because it grew and I'm not sure about it at all. That said, I'm in desperate need of a betareader, as English is not my native language and even though I've been writing for ten years, this is like fourth time I've written something long in English. I was told some parts may not make sense but all my friends capable of betaread are preoccupied with exams or work.  
> I hope I didn't scare you off...

„Do you remember the time you've spent with your father?“

The question is a rather peculiar one and even from the person standing next to the general, it is a surprise. Hux is taken aback for a moment – but he is General Hux after all, it is just a fleeting moment and of course he doesn't let it show. “Why would you ask me such a thing?”

The bridge is almost empty now, left only for a few members of the crew on night shift. All of them so tired that they need all the energy they can muster to do their work properly – none left to mind the knight and the general. Or maybe it's the fear. Hux have stopped caring a while ago – if he didn't he would have to do something about the disappointment he felt about their state after all, didn't he?

The fade lights of control panels flicker of Ren's helmet, but when the general looks at him, the other doesn't move, facing window, looking at the planet they are orbiting. Planet soon to be the deadliest weapon in the whole galaxy.

Ren gives of quite the feeling of unreachability – Hux is sure he tries his hardest for that. “I imagine you are fairly similar to him in a way...” it sounds strangely taunting, as if there was something wrong with being so.

Hux doesn't let himself be provoked. It may have not event be meant in such a way and it is just mere presence of the other man that gets on his nerves. It is never easy to deal with Kylo Ren – let alone when he has to. It is unfortunate and uncalled for to have to talk to him when he was just doing his last round around the ship before retreating to his chambers. To meet the Master of the Knights of Ren and have his personal space so rudely invaded for a such a talk – Hux can't fight a sigh. “Strange, that you would say so,” he answers anyway. “I do not believe you have met him?”

“No,” just slightly, he shakes his head and breaks the image of a statue.

Hux expects him to say more but he can't really tell – not with that thing on Kylo's head. So he just waits for a few moments before turning away from the spectacular view of the planet before them. “Well then,” he bows just slightly enough to let the other know that he is excusing himself.

He feels the uncomfortably familiar presence of something unknown at the back of his head and steels himself. Steels his mind. And stops. “You won't find what you carve for,” he says, only a whisper for the Force user to hear. “He was a commandant of the troops. He was a good father but not a caring man,” he doesn't turn around. Nor does Ren move but the feeling disappears and as he leaves the bridge, Hux once again wonders what is it about this angry incompetent child that the Supreme Leader sees in him.

 

 

The first thing greeting Hux in the morning is a report of a control room destroyed by Kylo Ren through the night. It reminds him of their conversation – if the exchange could even be called so – and makes him think about unimportant things he hoped to sleep off.

He didn't remember his father in a long while – nostalgic memories being an unnecessary luxury, was there something to remember. Funny in a way that Kylo Ren of all people would ask him about his father. Considering their relationship – strictly professional with a hint of rivalry at most – it was at least unexpected. Hux only hopes there won't be more such _conversations_ , as it was probably the reason of the other's tantrum, as rare and brief as the exchange was.

The family issues the knight apparently has have never been a concern to the general, so he just briefly deals with the report and lets it be. He has a meeting scheduled with Phasma about a mission and a lot of overseeing of building of the Starkiller Base. Kylo Ren, the overgrown child he is, has to make do himself.

As much as he wants to make a detour to the gym, he doesn't see himself making it on time now. The sound of heavy military boots behind him echoes through the hall and makes his head throb with starting headache. He tries to ignore it, hoping the _creature_ will just pass him.

No such luck.

“I will go,” the Knight of Ren demands, when he's next to the general.

“And where would that be?” Hux asks even though he has an idea. Surely not where he would like the Knight of Ren to go. He continues his way and doesn't look at the other – doesn't even want to meet him to be precise. He is not supposed to deal with insufferable child with daddy _and_ granddaddy issues.

“I am not a child!” Ren growls quietly, “I can take care of myself,” he adds, takes a deep breath.

The general didn't feel it this time, too fast and unexpected. He stops and takes in the way Kylo Ren looks in all his armor. And he can see it in the ever so slightly trembling shoulders and the way he is crouching a little. He can hear it in the deep breath Ren takes. A tantrum approaching. And yet, Hux feels daring. “As much as you could take care of the consoles in control room on 4th floor?”

The readhead feels the Force around him, feels the power that radiates from Kylo as the knight towers over the general. And then he thinks – He is strong. So powerful so capable of things Hux couldn't even dream of. And yet he lacks control. Hux hates him. Hates the way he makes it all go to vain with his behavior. Hux envies.

“I can't stand you,” Ren whispers through the mask and it sounds strangely muffled. “I can't stand it here! Not doing anything!” he takes another deep breath and releases Hux. “I'm going with Phasma, you don't need me here...”

The knight is fast to leave and Hux doesn't complain.

 

 

“Kill them all,” Kylo says, deep voice calm and strong. It is not the fist time and certainly not the last. He feels strangely complete and fulfilled, watching all the lives pass, watching them die. He fells the Force, feels the dark side sucking him deeper. Further from the light, to the places deep down where he belongs. Away from the _light side_.

It's just a moment until everything goes quiet. Phasma gives last orders and all the stormtroopers are going back to the ship, none looking back. None caring. That's how it's supposed to be. Everything quiet and beautifully death. No Resistance. Then he hears something. He stops and turns around, frowning under his mask, listening.

“Is there something wrong?” Phama asks, stopping next to him.

“No,” he says, shakes his head. “No...” and yet, he is going towards the pile of death bodies, almost curious. “I'll be right back,” he ensures Phasma.

 

 

Hux has never been to Kylo Ren's quarters before. And as much as he hoped it to stay that way, here he is – waiting for the other to open the door to his chambers, as he is impatiently looking around himself. It takes a while before the door opens, letting him in to the dark and surprisingly empty space of Ren's quarters. There are two armchairs and a table. Left for the black cloak thrown over one of the armchairs, it looks like it has never been used - Hux would not be surprised in the slightest.

And then the knight is coming from one of the doors, presumably his bedroom. He look thin without his cloak – too much for a _mighty knight_ – and a little comical to be honest, with the helmet still on his head in his private quarters.

“Do you need something, _general Hux_?” He asks and sounds a little irritated.

That picks on Hux's interest, it's almost as if the other was doing something he was not supposed to, being intruded by the general. Hiding something. Something that kept him here for three days straight, without a tantrum, without even going out. “You did not submit a report about the last mission,” Hux says simply. He wouldn't try to look in the bedroom, was it not for the knight's reaction to his visit. Now he is curious.

Ren apparently notices. He pushes the button to close the door behind him and approaches the general. “I was not aware that I was supposed to report to _you_ , general,” he answers.

“You are,” the readhead says as he straightens his back, trying to appear at least the same height as the other. Another thing he hates about Kylo Ren. “When you forcefully embark on a mission under my surveillance,” he adds because the truth they both know is Ren is not obliged to report to anyone except Supreme Leader Snoke.

“Nothing out of ordinary,” Kylo says as he looks Hux up and down. “Now if you excuse me, I was in the middle of meditation,” he says, not entirely lying.

“Is that so...?” the general doesn't look like he's about to leave. “With all due respect,” as if he really meant it, “I do not trust you. Captain Phasma mentioned, you may have found something down there,” Hux almost pities the woman a little, seeing as the knight crouches a little upon hearing her name. “What is it that you found among the Resistance?”

The Knight of Ren doesn't answer, only moves closer trying to appear as intimidating as possible. Was Hux not already quite used to his theatricals, he would certainly succeed. “It is nothing of your concern,” he hisses, “trust me on this.”

And then the general feels it, something new and rather strange. A little tingle in his nose, an itchy feeling he is not quite familiar with. Certainly not in the presence of Ren. “What is it?” he rises one eyebrow and looks right at the mask.

The mask looks right back and for several moment nothing moves, then Hux surprises himself with doing the least expected thing as he sneezes. He takes a step back, frowns. “What is it, Ren?” he repeats, not understanding the situation in the slightest.

And then he hears it too. What Kylo Ren heard upon the pile of death bodies down on Hosra.

From behind the bedroom door - a quiet weak and certainly not very dark _meow_.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a beta now. She tried hard on this chapter and made me feel like shit.  
> I hope it's better than the last time...

This is beyond unexpected. “Have you brought an animal on board?!” Hux feels himself being filled with rage and he doesn't even know why. It's probably just the hate for this childish, unreasonable side of Kylo Ren getting the better of him.

The mask stays silent.

“You are not doing this on my ship!” Hux demands, straightening himself and taking a deep breath.

“I _do not_ answer to your orders,” the knight reminds him silently. Unaffected by Hux's rage or – what is it even? An _allergy_? - he moves one hand towards the door. “As I consider this matter solved, could you let me to my meditation?” it sounded surprisingly calm.

Hux is everything but calm. “Is that why you have joined the First Order? Your _oh so terrible father_ didn't let you have a pet?” the general himself is certainly very aware that this is not good idea. But in his rage and hate and _envy_ , he can't stop himself. He hears the door open behind him without any of them pushing the button and he is sure about the tantrum now.

“Out!” Ren barks, hands trembling.

The general can see a disaster coming but he doesn't pay it any attention, sick of dealing with Kylo Ren. “It will not stay on my ship!” right back at Ren, “I don't care what the supreme leader lets you do, what they didn't-” he can't even finish. As if he needed to take out all the anger he feels towards the other man on the creature he didn't even see, he tries to fight battle quite out of his reach.

He understands as he is Force-thrown through the opened door. Rather pitiful for the best strategist in the First Order. The pain in his back will be reminding.

 

 

As Hux lies on the infirmary bed – which he doesn't really need, but the medic dared to _insist_ upon Hux taking a rest – he contemplates.

 

 

The next time he goes to Ren's quarters, the creature – which Hux has yet to see – has it's own house. A fucking _house_ right at the entrance. Put together sloppily from metal scraps and spare blankets probably by the Master of the Knights of Ren himself. But the house is empty.

The redhead sneezes right as he gets in the room, quite not so sterile as it was the first time he was there two days ago.

“What do you want?” Ren barks, standing at the entrance to his bedroom, the door behind him closed.

Hux sighs, closes his eyes for a moment. He thought about it. Really hard, actually, how childish he was himself, bursting out like that. How the envy got the better of him. How this was actually not that bad – as it kept Ren out of sight and without throwing tantrums. How inappropriate for a member of the First Order it was to have a _pet_ , was a different matter altogether, but not one to be discussed right now.

Yet, he didn't come here to apologize, of course. “Show it to me,” he demands.

“So you can throw him to open space?” The mask doesn't show Kylo's face and Hux is sick of trying to imagine it so he just doesn't. He is sick of quite a lot of thing already, to be honest.

“Him? Didn't expect you of all the people to have mercy,” he almost spits, then he reminds himself why he came – not at all affected by the hand the Knight of Ren sticks out in front of himself. He takes a deep breath and sights. “I just want to know what is on my ship.”

Kylo hesitates. For a while, he is watching the general considering and then pushes the button to open his bedroom door. He looks inside, then goes in.

Hux tries not to peek. But the black sheets with dark violet patterns are quite hard to miss. The bed looks comfortable and surprisingly tidy and here Hux is finding out yet another thing about Kylo Ren he doesn't need to know. His sleeping habits are really of no concern to the general. He hears the mask being taken of with a hiss and a thud and he considers leaving. Just letting it all be, maybe sealing the doors to Kylo Ren's quarters and just forgetting it all until the man finally leaves his ship. For good preferably.

“Madness...” Hux hears and – oh, _no_ , Ren actually gave it a fucking _name_. And the one, only he could come up with. Hux turns around just as the other male comes out of the room again, quite the peculiar creature in his hands.

The readhead growls quietly.

“Did you not want to see him general?” he has a deep and rich voice, rather pleasant to listen to without the mask, was it not Kylo Ren's voice.

“ _It_...” Hux tries mostly to himself. He would love to come up with appropriately biting remark, but he can't. All he can is look at the other and think of how wrong he was when he tried to imagine his face. He looks childish. Even after all the theatricals, Hux didn't expect that. He looks several years younger than he is supposed to be, has somehow puppy eyes and soft, pale and _sad_ lips. Messy black hair are all around his face, probably because of the helmet.

“Have you not come for something else to see?” he sounds amused and Hux is instantly ashamed of himself. He notices that Ren got probably too used to having that thing on his head, as the amusement is shown all over his face.

The general straightens, puts his hands behind his back and takes another deep breath. He tries hard to have this matter over as soon as possible. “Take it to the infirmary,” he says as he examines the creature. It is not very big – it can't weight more than a blaster rifle – and it looks _fluffy_ . It's all black fur and it looks at him with two round eyes – one is white and probably blind and the other one is sharp green and full of doubts – and waves two furry tails into Kylo's face. The knight doesn't seem to mind. He looks amused and the questioning look he gives Hux for his remark is all that is needed to make the general to hate his face _beyond fucking measure_. At least he doesn't hate the mask so much anymore.

Hux sneezes again. “You have picked it up on a pile of dead bodies, as I recall correctly what captain Phasma said she saw. It apparently has a disease in its eye and it can have more – I do not want it on my ship,” he explains briefly. Then, he hesitates before asking: “Does the supreme leader know?”

Kylo shrugs and he looks so normal and _human_ it makes Hux sick. The headgear may be a good idea after all, for this is not at all the way people should see the Master of the Knights of Ren. “I cannot imagine him not knowing,” he answers.

 _And he does nothing_ , the general thinks as he wonders again what is it that makes Supreme Leader Snoke favor this person so much. This time he turns away to leave for good.

And yet, he can't keep himself from looking back, as he goes through the door and excuses himself.

“You know, _general_ , I do not actually hate you. I never have,” Kylo Ren says with an interesting spark in his eyes right before the door slides shut and Hux have no idea what is going on yet again.

 

 

“Sir!”

He hears it but he doesn't even look at the person greeting him as he work out.

Probably taking it as a good sight, she continues, “so... a mattaar?”

Hux almost managed to forget. But the word spread fast and the finalizer is small enough for the news about the animal to spread through the whole ship. He managed to make it to morning exercise today, only to be found by Phasma there, apparently quite unaffected by her role in this whole matter – Hux can only imagine the reason being Kylo Ren not meeting her until yesterday – and aware of the knight's evening trip to the infirmary.

“Gossiping now, captain?” he answers with a huff, as he puts the weights in their place to look at her.

“Everyone knows,” she says, her face remaining as stoic as ever. “All the medics are probably traumatized for the rest of their lives...” she adds and even without the mask, the general can't quite tell if she finds it amusing or sad.

It was probably true that in the presence of other people, Kylo Ren remained as frightening as ever. Maybe even more so, as he threatened to kill on the spot everyone who would as much as just look bad at his creature on the spot. But it was not a good thing. He was getting attached and Kylo Ren getting attached to anything could not be a good thing for anyone.

Hux sighs.

Phasma probably takes it as encouragement as she continues “do you know, general, what they say about them?” she starts and he wonders, where did she came about the idea of them being this close. They didn't even _look_ at each other in the gym before. He is her superior and they didn't really talk _friendly_ before. It probably is Kylo Ren being here too long and the whole ship starting to go mad because of it. “About mattaars...”

He gives her quite an uninterested look, “no...” he says. “Should I?”

“It is interesting,” Phasma nods her head as she continues: “They live around people but they don't interact with them, except for going through the thrash and such and devouring _everything_ that's left,” she probably means the bodies Hux notes, “they can't be tamed.”

This time, he looks at her a little amused.

“People tried, but mattaars can be rather fierce when they try... and they are said to bring bad luck...” she stands up. “If I may express my opinion, I'd say, the creature suits him quite well,” this time she gives the general something he would even call a smirk, as she moves to work out.

Hux ignores it and excuses himself as he makes his way to his duties. Bad luck, she says.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mattaar – I made the creature up (is that allowed? :D), but it's just bad tempered cat with two tails.


	3. Chapter 3

 

“General Hux,” Kylo Ren says as he stands right next to the other male.

The redhead acknowledges his existence by a mere nod and continues staring to the empty cold space behind an enormous window. He fights the need to move a little further from the knight as their shoulders are almost touching. He doesn't want another late night chat with this walking headache. Ren kept himself out of sight these past few days, preoccupied with the creature and it was good.

“You are rude,” the knight sighs and Hux wonders whether he actually mastered reading minds so the victim cannot tell until he wants them to, or he is just being grumpy about the lack of greetings.

Hux frowns at him and then he feels the Force. So it was about the greeting. “Stop it,” he says, accusatory look in his eyes.

Surprisingly, Ren listen. “Actually, I have read about your father quite a lot, ” he says and here they are, in the last conversation Hux wanted to get back to.

“Have you now?” he surrenders with a sigh. “I'd rather not have this... conversation again,” he tries, studying the patterns of the reflections the lights of the main deck consoles make on Kylo's helmet, “shall it end up like the last time...”

Kylo sighs, crouches a little, but otherwise he doesn't move. “What do you think of me, general?” he asks instead and even through the filter his voice sounds strangely raspy.

This is a new one. “Don't you know...” the general looks back into the empty space. It's not even a question. “I hate you,” he adds if it was not clear enough.

“Of that I am sure,” Ren answers and shakes his head a little. “But that is not what I was asking...”

Hux is tired. It's late and he doesn't want to talk or interact in any way with this headache, whatsoever. This time he may even enjoy his trip to the infirmary. “You are an insufferable child,” he says not looking at Kylo. “You can't keep calm, can't use your power, whatever they are, to its full potential. Even I can see  _that_ . You are demanding and I need to clean up all you messes,” it's there, as he continues, getting rather uncomfortable. “Your obsession over Darth Vader is just laughable at this point. You are  _not_ Dart Vader and I can't really imagine him breaking consoles over someone insulting his  _pet._ ” He feels it at the back of his neck, threatening to break it anytime. He tries not to pay it any attention – Kylo asked, didn't he? It just confirms all the general is saying. “You are  _spoiled_ ,” in some way he sickly enjoys the idea of the Master of the Knights of Ren using the Force on him and ratifying everything he said. “But I respect you in some way. I am well aware of your strength.” Hux imagines the baby face under the helmet to express utter surprise. “Shall you learn to control it, I may even change my mind quite drastically.”

“You are changing it already...” the knight says quietly and Hux pays him a deep frown. He shudders under the feeling of something – someone – in his mind. “You are not like your father,” Ren continues, surprisingly calm now. “You hated him, didn't you?” there is a smile in his voice and again, Hux hates it. “Your good father.”

The general really wants to leave now. But he won't let the other win. “He made me who I am now,” he says and looks at Ren. His pale blue eyes show quite the sick shade of green in the flickering lights of main deck consoles.

“You wanted a _dog_...?” it's amused and this time, it's Hux who is filling with rage and it _hurts_ now. “He didn't let you have it. Didn't let you have a _friend_...” Ren gets closer, one hand up, almost touching the general's torso, and Hux feels his stomach flip in a way that makes him feel like he would puke, did he eat anything for dinner. His head – his mind? – hurts and trying to fight Ren doesn't help it. “He didn't _care_... He _beat_ your mother...” 

“Get the fuck out!” it's a whisper but sounds intimidating anyway. The general is trembling, beads of sweat forming on his forehead.

“You are quite a hypocrite, aren't you general?” the filtered but still awfully mocking voice shows that Ren is not at all affected by the way Hux looks.

“It's in the past!” the words are loud enough to make a few members of the staff look at him and if he looked back and remembered their faces transfer would be the least bad thing happening to them.

He shivers. This whole thing is disgusting. As he straightens and turns to leave, he gives Ren a look of utter despise.

 

 

The hangar is a mess. Utter disorder. The loud sounds of Kylo Ren's military boots on the metal floor are completely lost in all the noise, as he marches right through the middle. He is angry and the rage filling him is so apparent to everyone that they don't even dare to look at him. The lightsaber is in his hand, glowing awfully unstably and quite unnecessary at this point. From the corner of his eye he catches a glimpse of Phasma being taken to the infirmary and it makes him  _burn_ . He doesn't care about her, he cares about the First Order being  _the best_ .

There was an ambush expecting them on the planet as they landed only to find a small army of rebels jumping at them out of nowhere. They must have been very familiar with the woods – there were not many enemy soldiers and yet, the First Order lost more than a half of the dispatched troops. Even though there was no way they could have known they're coming.

Everything is in chaos and as the last ship lands, the finalizer is fast to close the hangar gate and jump into hyperspace.

They were only supposed to search the area for remnants of the Resistance and artifacts leading to the map of Skywalker. This was an utter disgrace and Ren hates it. He hates everything right now and he can't keep himself as the Force overwhelms him and the TIE fighter right next to him crumbles in itself with the pilot still inside and blows up as the knight walks by. Making everything only worse.

_He is disgrace_ .

He needs to get to Hux's head. It's calm and composed, so tidy and always in beautiful order. It is really hard to find something there, the general hides it and fights for it well. But Kylo doesn't need to find anything right now. He needs to get to a calm place where he can compose himself. And right now there is only one such a place on the whole ship.  _He needs to get to Hux's head_ .

He meets the general in a corridor leading to the chamber where they can contact Snoke. There is no one close by as everyone is still shaken and running around trying hard to regain order. 

“There were casualties,” Hux says in a strong and professional voice. He walks straight, hands behind his back and is trying hard not to let anything show on his face. It is still quite though how really dissatisfied he is. 

“Oh? You tell me about it,” Ren spits. He doesn't really think about it twice before giving in to the desire and invading the other's mind.

The general stops abruptly right in front of the door and looks at him with disbelief. “What are you doing?!” he jerks his head up and frowns. Steels himself. It is beautiful in a way, Kylo thinks. “Stop it!” he hisses.

The knight shakes his head. He doesn't move toward the chamber anymore. This is not something for the supreme leader to see anyway, so he doesn't hurry to enter.

“What are you looking for?” the redhead growls.

And yet, Kylo notices, his mind is still beautifully clean. He exhales deeply, taking it all in. “I am not looking for anything,” he answers as he finally puts away his lightsaber. He didn't even realize he should up until now. His voice doesn't crack anymore and it feels  _good_ . 

“Then. Get. Out!” it's still quiet, but there's a threat in the words. Kylo ignores it.

And then the knight is taking his helmet of, looking Hux in the eyes with his brown and utterly unfitting ones. “Let me in,” he says in voice as unfitting as his eyes.

“Your sorcery will not work on me. You can read my mind but you won't make me do what you want,” the general is starting to look quite impatient and it's starting to affect his mind this time. This, Kylo doesn't like.

“I am not doing _my sorcery_ ,” he answers. “I am...” and he trails of not finishing. He won't tell him. He won't say anything of it. He can't. So he leaves the other's mind and turns towards the door. Pushes it open.

Hux takes a deep breath, goes through the door right behind the knight and he remembers the animal bringing bad luck.

 

 

As he finishes his orders, Snoke looks at them as if something changed, but he says nothing and he dismisses them as usual.

 

 

“Why did you bring it on board, anyway?” Hux asks. He is sitting this time, as he didn't stop on the bridge but a little further his way down. He still watches the empty space through a window, but this time much smaller one.

Maybe he though Ren won't find him here but the knight came to invade his space and bother him anyway. As if he thought they were now having midnight chats regularly. No.

Hux realizes then, he talked first. Feels a little confused. A moment passes, he fights a yawn and stops thinking about it.

“He's a mess. His mind is unlike anything I have ever experienced...” this time Kylo Ren makes no remark on the lack of greetings. He sits next to Hux and answers right away – it's not really that hard to guess what the male is talking about.

“You went in the head of _animal_ you have found on pile of dead bodies?” the redhead looks at him, eyes a little widening.

“Do not judge me...” there comes a huff through the voice filter.

Hux was just confirming he got the idea right. Was it something to judge by? “Oh, I am certainly not, it's even fascinating. In a sick and creepy way at least.”

Kylo just stares. Or the mask does, at least. He is supposed to frighten people, whatever it takes.

“Is it how you tamed it? With the Force or whatever your sorcery is?” Hux waves a hand.

“No,” Kylo is calm and Hux wonders what happened to his rage. Maybe he is just tired. Hux is sure as hell he himself is tired to death – and yet, he cannot imagine the Master of the Knights of Ren sleeping _peacefully_. “He clung to me... I didn't try to tame him... I didn't even want to take him with me at first but he clung to me so I had no choice...” the knight continues.

The general has a few choices in mind but he appreciates Ren's calmness so he keeps them to himself. “I am not even surprised...” he just shakes his head.

They are quiet for a while and then Hux speaks up again, against all his better judgment – didn't he want to have this over? He didn't really want to talk to Ren now, did he? “What it's like?” he asks.

Kylo Ren takes of his helmet. Hux tries to fight it but in the end he looks at him anyway and sees a sparkle in Ren's eyes, one he is not quite able to name. The eyes look darker, almost black in the dim corridor. “It's in chaos,” he answers, recalling the mind of a mad animal. “There are no words, only images. Fast, dim and unfocused flashes. A lot of strange feelings, not quite like anything I know...” he looks lost in thoughts and Hux is taken aback by the view. “There are only dark colors layered one over another... it is hazy and disordered... it is beautiful...” he looks back at the general and licks his pale lips. Pale and s _oft_ and  _sad_ lips.

“Is it now...?” the redhead manages to ask as he suppresses a shiver. 

“Definitely, in a way...” the other man nods, but he doesn't add anything about the way being right the opposite to the general's own – maybe even more beautiful.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The dog was probably not really a dog, as they probably don't have dogs in Star Wars universe, but something similar, friendly and cuddly and unfitted for young Hux... Oh god, my poor Hux, this makes him look like he's not the evil heartless space nazi he tries to look like. He is...


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No beta again, I'm sorry...

As Hux enters, the knight is already sitting in an armchair, the creature on his lap – Madness, was it? – and Ren feeds it something that suspiciously reminds Hux of the remnants of a hand of the last Resistance member they interrogated. It may not be such an unfitting pet for the First Order after all.

“Did you call me here to show me that we will no longer need furnaces?” he asks as the door to Ren's quarters close behind him.

“We will, actually, as the bones are quite hard to digest and I would rather not let Madness eat them,” the other answers and if he noticed the mocking tone in the general's voice, he surprisingly doesn't let it show. The helmet is on his head so Hux can't really tell.

“So what is it?” the general sneezes. He feels the knight looking at him, and there's silence between them for several moments.

“We found out how did the Resistance knew about the landing,” Ren then says and he waves the hand a little, Madness hissing at him as he took it right from its mouth. He seems to be in a _good mood_. Hux is not sure whether he has actually seen him like that ever before. He thinks not.

_Theatricals..._ He makes no remark. “Good,” he says, then hesitates a little. “Shouldn't you be doing something about it?” he rises one eyebrow.

“I was wondering, general...” Ren starts as he puts the creature on the floor. It takes the hand and hides with it in its strange and sloppy house. “Have you ever killed a man with your own hands?” he tilts his head to side. “Tortured him to death?”

And Hux feels, as if the other man is somehow daring. Overstepping his boundaries and doing something inappropriate – unacceptable, even. But he can't quite pinpoint what makes him feel like that so he tries to shake his head and the feeling with it. “I have killed thousands,” he says before the shake can be taken as an answer.

The knight takes of his helmet, stepping closer, “you have people for that, yes,” he narrows his eyes, his tone a little disappointed. “But have you ever taken a life with your own bare hands?” he looks like a predator.

Hux have, actually. Long time ago, when he was not yet a general, when he did not spent most of his time on the board of finalizer or at the base. He have killed people with his own hands. It comes rushing back, the memories of the thrill. He feels goosebumps and a shiver and out of nowhere, the knight is on him. All over him. In his head.

The blackhaired male grips his chin crushes his lips to the general's and kisses him hard.

Hux fights it. Fight _him_. Tries really hard to push the other away as fast as possible, but then something cracks. It shatters and with loud and sickening noise only the general can hear, it falls. He fights, still, but for dominance. He won't let Ren get the upper hand.

He grips the knight's shoulder, his other hand fast in the black messy locks, fisting, pulling. He changes their position, slamming the other against the wall, as he hungrily devours everything he is given. He doesn't think, as their tongues battle for dominance, he just takes. He pushes one thigh between Ren's legs and moves his hand a little higher, gripping his neck. Fingers digging in the pale skin.

Hux is quite aware that the knight is taller that him and certainly much more powerful – that he probably _lets_ the general take the lead. In a strange way, it makes this whole thing so much better. As if Ren accepted his _dominance_.

It feels wonderful, like nothing Hux felt these past few _years_ and he doesn't want it to end. He can't. He can't let himself be confronted with reality. Not yet at least.

Kylo shivers under him and lets out a quiet moan. It goes right to Hux's groin and everything is spinning, really, as his whole world is turned upside down.

He almost jumps away. He needs to get air, to get the fuck hold of himself. He looks at Ren almost accusingly, still not sure what to think. The knight's hair is even more messy than before, he is flushed, lips a little parted and _tempting_ and he is a fire, a burning _beauty_ Hux _wants_.

Hux would rather just not think anything at this point, really.

“Come, general, let me show you again, how is it to crush a beating heart with your own hand...” he hears the knight say in a raspy voice as he puts the helmet back on and Hux fully snaps to reality.

Yet, he still feels lightheaded, the rush of blood beating in his ears. He follows.

 

 

This time, Kylo confronts him just as he is about to enter his quarters and go to bed.

And here Hux was thinking – hoping maybe – that the other got scared after what happened and he will finally stop bothering him. The fact that right now the general doesn't feel at all as bothered as he'd like to look is a completely different matter.

He is still not sure what to think. How to take it. He kissed a person he hates to death – and even though he wouldn't be able to admit it even to himself, it was wonderful and he loved it – he watched Kylo interrogate a Resistance spy with his whatever-sorcery – and enjoyed that as well – then killed the man himself. He feels like a part of sick pair who gets off on torturing and it's disturbing in more ways than one. (Did he call himself and Kylo Ren a pair? He didn't certainly get off on torturing... and so on.) He just wants to sleep this whole day off and wake up tomorrow to find everything – except the part about resolving the Resistance spy problem maybe – was just a bad dream.

He lets Kylo in without even asking. The no greetings thing is starting to be something of a ritual. He takes of his coat putting it neatly on a rack before turning to Ren as the door slides shut behind them.

“Were you going after this the whole time?” he asks with a sigh. “You are really terrible at flirting...” it sounds somehow soft, but Hux lets it go.

“You hate me,” the knight remarks as he takes his helmet off to look at Hux with his brown and disturbingly soft eyes.

“I do,” the general nods. Still rather sure of it.

“You know, _general_ , I too hate something about you,” Kylo reacts getting closer. “I hate how you are always so composed and perfect, I want to shatter this mask of yours, I want to...” and there are Ren's hands in his hair _messing it up_ , and he is kissing him, wild and hard, and it somehow feels ok. Right even.

So the general answers by dragging him to his bed.

 

 

“Take me,” Kylo Ren says. He is almost naked, flushed, his lips swollen from kissing, wet and _beautiful_. His eyes sparkle with desire.

And he looks so submissive and willing and _inviting_. It's disgusting. It makes Hux sick. It makes him want the knight and everything he offers. So he takes it all. Wild and hard and devouring everything like a hungry animal.

Hux is more than sure he still hates everything about Kylo Ren. Especially his face, his eyes, his soft, sad lips.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is it.  
> I actually have a continuation in mind, but I'm not sure about it. I kind of lost my beta and I'm not sure there's a point in putting anything here without her and I was trying to write more of Kylo's pov, but it's surprisingly hard. (Except for Matt, the radar technician. I actually have a scene with him because I just had to... I may make it into a short crack...)


End file.
